How to Change Your Feelings for Your Husband/ Wife

Therapist Tip: Fake It Til You Make It
I often work with couples who feel so disconnected that they just don’t feel like they can show each other kindness and affection. I tell them that they can’t wait until they feel warmth for one another again. If they just wait for that feeling to happen, it may not. If they truly want their marriage to have a chance they need to “ Act as If” of fake it till you feel it . Acting as if is just what it sounds like. It might mean sharing a laugh or hug even when your not felling warmth towards each other. It might mean being kind, cordial or cheerful even when your feeling apathetic.This exercise is about going through the motions of acting like the relationship is going to survive. Doing things that you would do if the relationship were healthy. Treating each other like someone you will spend the rest of your life with.

I know it’s difficult to pretend to be feel something that you really aren’t feeling, but it is possible for our emotions to change when our behaviors change. If your behavior says ‘I like you” theres a good chance you’ll be able to feel like you like them. If your behaviors say I care about you and love you it’s possible for those feelings to resurface as well.

Marriage Counseling at Confidential Care Professional Counseling

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